Hope everyone had a kickass long weekend. I certainly did. Grilling, sunshine, sleeping late, family time, friends and 5 barre classes in 4 days! BAM. 🙂
So I wanted to make “Self-Reflection Sunday” a feature here in the little piece of the interwebz…but it was a long weekend and this is the first time I’ve booted my laptop since Friday. I think I needed the break. I love my job, but sometimes it’s all-consuming. I’m on my Blackberry until midnight, I’m responding to emails until wee hours of the morning. I needed to disconnect and reclaim my life and my free time. I’m happy to say this weekend I did that!(Sidenote: my boss always yells at me for working as much as I do – this is self-imposed not work-imposed obsession, LOL).
I also took time to clean out my iPod, added more motivational songs for the gym and got rid of those songs that reminds me of people I don’t know anymore. It’s funny how places, smells, songs etc. have associations (more on my crazy food associations later). Then I sat here recapping my weekend in my had. Saturday I had a major meltdown concerning this body of mine. It sounds silly in hindsight, but I kept thinking about how great I’ve been doing with food ~ and how many things I’ve given up – why aren’t I a size 10 yet dammit!? Why don’t I have one body part that wants to cooperate with summer clothes?! (No capris, I have cankles – STILL, no sleeveless tops – bat wings, no dresses for a while until my stomach pooch flattens). Gah. I wish for every healthy meal you ate or kickass workout you endured one bad decision was erased from your past. Wouldn’t that be amazing?! Nerds friends, please work on this concept for me and see if you can invent a machine. I’ll be the beta tester. 🙂
Luckily I have a very rational and supportive support system (thanks this week to Mom, Derek and Stasia) I was talked off the ledge. Let’s be perfectly frank here – I haven’t been kicking this much ass all along. I spent months half-assing it and making excuses. I can’t expect perfection overnight….I didn’t get fat overnight (though sometimes I swear to god it feels like it!). I don’t think I ever realized how big I was at my heaviest. It didn’t dawn on me that I was rotating out the same 6 outfits over and over. Now that I’m exploring the massive clothing collection I have I’m surprised to discover things I’ve never worn fit – score! Things from last year fit MUCH better this year – double score! I am making progress, it’s just not as fast as I want. I think some of it is my impatience and some of it is the “but I didn’t go to Bagel world and have a sesame toasted bagel with scallion cream cheese and a huge mocha iced coffee today – shouldn’t I have lost 5 pounds just for being awesome?” mentality. I feel better without that damn bagel, I know I do….I just wish I could have the bagel and the svelte body of my dreams!
Saturday I did a double with Jo – which killed for the record – and burned 1313 calories! I snapped a picture on my way out:
On Facebook my caption was “Goodbye 1313 calories, hello collar bones! Please, stay a while”. Looking at that picture I see progress. I see determination. I see strength. Sidenote: I need to take more full-length pictures for comparison later!
So, I’m over my hissy fit and moving forward. Dust yourself off and all that jazz. Time for some Sunday Self-Reflection questions!
What is the top priority in your life right now?
It’s a tie – weight-loss/health and enjoying my life as much as possible. I’m trying to focus on little things that make my day (like seeing old fiends who “get me” or spending my calories wisely on a well-deserved treat). I’m having conversations about where I want to be with people (rather than keeping it to myself). I’m making lists of things to try (like a 5K or hiking or surfing) as I reach different milestones. I’m planning for a kickass future.
What are the biggest actions you can take now to create the biggest results in your life?
As much as it pains me to say it ~ just keep swimming. Oh and get some cardio in. LOL. I finally found my perfect exercise routine, perfect support system and perfect calorie allotment – now I just have to keep at it and trust myself. It’s nice to know I’m where I’m supposed to be, I just wish I had figured it out sooner! 🙂
How are you feeling today?
So glad I didn’t write this a few days ago…haha. Today I am awesome. I worked out, spent time with my Mom and Stasia, saw barre friends, spent some time alone and got ready for a lovely 3 day work-week before a weekend away. Yay! Ready for a little fun in the sun.
Quote of the week:
Cheers to a nice, short work week!